A Prayer for Postpartum Depression

Father, I am holding my baby, and yet I feel so far away from everything, even from myself. Everyone told me this would be the happiest time, and I am ashamed of how heavy and frightened I feel instead. I love this child, and still the sadness will not lift.

I confess the guilt that floods me when I cannot feel the joy I am supposed to feel. I am exhausted in body and spirit, and some days I wonder if I am the mother my baby needs.

So I bring all of it to You, the tears that come from nowhere, the numbness, the fear I am afraid to say out loud. You are not disappointed in me. You see a tired mother and You move toward her with tenderness.

I ask You to steady my mind and lighten this weight. Give me the courage to tell my partner, my doctor, my midwife the truth of how I feel, because reaching for help is not failure but love. Surround me with people who will hold the baby so I can rest.

You promise to gather Your little ones close and to gently lead the ones who are nursing. Lead me gently now.

I surrender my picture of what this should look like, and I trust You with my child and with me. Be near in the long nights. Amen.